Reality bites
Tantrum. Foot stomping, pot slamming, all out rage tantrum. I threw one. My inner two-year old went wild and I let her.
It was one of those mornings when everything seemed to be going awry. I woke feeling heavy, sluggish, and sore – two full days of hacking gardens took its toll.
After the joy of hiking in the mountains, walking seaside and rainforest trails, and returning to garish green gardens under an azure sky, the reality of what I’m attempting to achieve with our property kind of smacked me sideways for a moment.
The reality of returning from a long-overdue break, the mountain of jobs lined up, my hubby’s return to his job – leaving me alone to deal with the various issues – and some emotional turmoil I hadn’t quite put my finger on; it all came to a head when I bashed my head!
I’ve learned a thing or two about stress over the past few years and the fact that I was constantly overloading my nervous system so the tiniest thing would tip me over the edge, causing a slew of ongoing health issues.
Everyone has stress and we need a certain degree of it to motivate ourselves. Living with chronic stress is harmful on every level. Once I figured out that I have the trait of high sensitivity, I realised why I felt constantly overloaded, seemingly unable to handle the everyday stresses that life throws at us.
This year I’ve overhauled my life in an attempt to recover from a lifetime of chronic stress and nervous system overload. I’m working to build resilience, understand my triggers, and how to find balance. Obviously, my wee tantrum proves I’m not quite there yet!
Releasing the pent-up cocktail of emotions like a toddler helped, and no pots were harmed! Sometimes it’s good to let off steam in a safe environment, and while a tantrum probably isn’t the most constructive or emotionally mature approach, it helped me gain clarity about the situation.
I use several tactics to maintain balance and release stress – a tantrum isn’t usually one of them, but a good foot-stomping, body-flinging dance session definitely is, and the two don’t look dissimilar.
The usual suspects – yoga, meditation, hiking in nature, gardening, practising gratitude – are in my go-to de-stress toolkit. I’ve also found taking a shower when I return from a particularly stressful outing is very helpful as I wash away the energy I accumulate from other people.
Anything that engages your senses, helping to ground you in the present, is also helpful, for example, aromatherapy, an intense workout to your favourite music, or patting your pets can all help alleviate the effects of stress.
I figured out why I was in such a wound-up state and worked through the various triggers by journalling, then I headed outside, mowed some lawns, and got stuck into the gardens. I also “ate the frog”, tackling a couple of the jobs bugging me first – it felt great to get them out of the way.
Now that I’ve changed my life to remove the biggest stressors, it’s easier to maintain balance, and the impact on my health is dramatic. I’m rarely sick or injured, and I’m fitter, stronger, and generally calmer most of the time.
Of course, there are still days when stuff gets to me and I’m not averse to letting my toddler occasionally have a tantrum if it feels like the right moment and release. I’m also content to build my lifestyle around my need for a peaceful, simple existence – gone are the days of fighting to prove I’m worthy by someone else’s standards.
Chronic stress is endemic across so many societies and it’s causing a massive amount of harm. Figuring out what your toolkit looks like may take a while, but it’s honestly worth it.
(Oh, George is a constant traveling companion - he’s been all over Aotearoa New Zealand, up mountains, and on the front of a Ducati motorbike.)